You can view my nice HTML newsletter here or read the text below...

Forward!

I see a silver lining to the United State's current situation: it's grave enough to inspire change. If the USDA is too understaffed to ensure food safety, maybe it's time to pivot to CSA's, farmer's markets, and gardening ahead of supply chain breakdown due to climate change. If the ACA is on the chopping block, maybe switch to a direct primary care provider and/or CostPlusDrugs. Frightened by Amazon's, Facebook's, and X's swings to the right? It's a great time to buy from Bookshop.org and local stores and check out BlueSky or Diaspora. Disclaimer: None of these options, especially the healthcare ones, are flawless; proceed at your own risk. With that disclaimer ringing in your ears, yes, it's a frightening time and risky as heck, but it's also an invitation to seek out new harmonies.

OwnHands Fiction Search Update: It's Not Quite Dead...

It feels much better. Monty Python jokes aside, Glenn and I just met to discuss our progress so far. He's facing a challenge in trying to build this project with open source tools. Because this will be a digital commons, but it's longer and harder. For that reason, we're fishing for others with programming experience to come on board and help us out, especially with back-end work. If you or someone you know is interested, please reach out to me. It's a labor of love for now, but once we have a proof of concept, we'll be applying for grants.

Whatever Happened to Being Cut?

Life is ironic. After talking up my book on relationship cutoff, I've decided not to release it widely. Too many people have misinterpreted me as saying that it’s fine to ignore boundaries. That’s not what I said. Yet this misreading raises the possibility that some might use my book as an excuse to harm others. I don’t want to be responsible for that.

I have also had favorable responses, some "every therapist should read this" types of response, and I believe this book can help some people in some circumstances. I will, therefore, continue to offer it on a limited basis (e-formats free) to some people I interact with personally. If you are interested in learning more or receiving a copy, please contact me.

labingi

Election Reflections

Like everyone on the left, I'm scared for our future. I'm also hopeful. In the face of the fear and polarization, there's an undercurrent of mutual care I don't remember seeing in 2016 or 2020. There's a sense that the left needs to do some soul searching. In this moment, I personally think our most important task is listening. Our most important stance is compassion, remembering the humanity of each person.

Book Launch for Being Cut

Sunday, January 26, at 11:30 a.m.

Kairos-Milwaukie United Church of Christ
4790 SE Logus Road, Milwaukie OR 97222.

Join me January 26 for a brief reading from Being Cut: A Rumination on Relationship Cutoff and open discussion of why cutoff happens, how cutoff feels, and how we can to heal from it or limit its harm. (No pressure to attend the church service before the event.)

I didn't write this book with this election in mind, but I think the book may be timely. At its most basic, it's about listening and connection, things we need now more than ever.

Own Hands Story Search Update

Glenn and I have been slammed by the day jobs, which has slowed our progress on our story search tool (and these newsletters). But as I write this, he coding away on website setup. I'll keep you posted!

Current Mood: accomplished

labingi

Own Hands Story Search Is on the Move

Glenn and I have developed a bewildering ton of search categories for the Own Hands fiction search tool based on user input. We're now whittling this down to a few key areas to create a proof-of-concept. Search areas will include tone, happy/sad ending, type of antagonist, and several categories for describing the protagonist/main characters and types of relationships. We'll also have keywords you can include or exclude for genre and content warnings.

Both Glenn and I just got new day jobs (him, working with apps to help veterans with health issues; me, teaching Higher Ed in Prison through Portland State U). This means our progress on Own Hands will be steady but slow. The next major steps are to finalize our trial categories and begin programming--when I say "we" here, I mean Glenn. :-)

Has a Loved One Cut You Off? This Book's for You

Being Cut, my non-fiction book on relationship cutoff, is now widely available in e-book format (print format to follow soon). I'm seeking early readers/reviewers. If you'd like a free review copy (e-book or PDF), just reply to this email. It's been a ten-year journey for me since a dear friend cut me off, with five years working on this book. I'm excited to help others facing cutoff pain.

Cover with the words "Being Cut" in white and red and "Arwen Spicer" in white against a black background.

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Own Hands Story Search

Entries tagged with books

Newsletter for, um, March?

Forward!

OwnHands Fiction Search Update: It's Not Quite Dead...

Whatever Happened to Being Cut?

Election Reflections & Book Launch

Election Reflections

Book Launch for Being Cut

Own Hands Story Search Update

Closer to Choosing the Fiction You Want

Own Hands Story Search Is on the Move

Has a Loved One Cut You Off? This Book's for You

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December 2025

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